A Healthy Diet of Sex
by Chamberpot
Summary: Edward decides to give Bella a very healthy diet of sex. One-Shot!


Bella…

Just her name shot electricity through my body. A mere mortal with a finger stuck in an electrical outlet would not receive the same feeling. Only a vampire with no soul, no worth, would feel this after so many years of loathe and failure. It was desire and it was intense.

Balancing like a trapeze artist on the branch nearest to her window, I watched her. Her toothpick frame entered the room, almost blocking the light from the lamp nearest to her door. She immediately turned to look at her reflection in the mirror.

_Oh my Bella, why do you care how you look? Only care about how I feel about you, buttercup! _

I had lied to her about how every boy in our school felt like jumping her bones when she experienced her first day. Of course, it was wrong of me. I wanted her to feel uneasy, but more determined to fall to my charm – if I was the only one trying to court her. Every boy actually thought she was too disgusting to look at. I constantly was greeted with the thought 'twenty bucks if I can nail her before the week was over', at a higher and lower price too.

But there she was, fanning her thinned brown hair in the mirror with her skeletal like arms. _Dear god, what does that girl eat?_ She was too thin for my liking, but I was sure when I was done with her, I'd get more food into that anorexic body of hers.

Her pale, colorless lips puckered in front of the mirror. As if she was trying to seduce an invisible admirer. No doubt, that admirer would be a fantasized version of me. And if it was not, then Bella and I would certainly be having a talk.

Slowly, her hands wandered from her hair to her neck. And then, her hands went to her almost invisible breasts. One would think she was not developed, or that she was twelve by the size of them. But I knew better, because my name was Edward Cullen…

First, her left hand cupped her right breast, squeezing it gently. I gasped at the risqué Bella I was seeing come out before my eyes. And then her right hand fanned against her stomach and to her skirt. Undoing the button, her claw like hands reached into the fabric of her panties.

My eyes immediately went to her face, watching her eyes widen. Then, her head fell back, and she moaned an ugly sound from the back of her throat. It sounded like a cat dying in an empty alley. But to me, it was music to my ears. I had never heard such a beautiful sound coming from such a creature.

I was watching her right hand work below, while her left hand worked away at her right breast. _God Bella, help! I'm drowning in lust right now!_

She then stopped moaning, and removed her hand from her panties. And her hand dropped down to her side. She walked over to her bed, and sat down on the edge of it. Her weight hardly left an indentation, but she seemed to be relaxed… but unfilled and wanting more.

I watched her kick off her shoes, and unrolling her socks off her crow feet. She then tore into her button down shirt and removed that, leaving her bra to be seen. And then, her finger worked away at the button to her khaki skirt, slipping that down her body.

So now she was only clothed in her bra and underwear. I inched closer to her window. My amber eyes turning almost black from the lust of her naked body. I growled, trying to hold back my emotions.

And as soon as I did, I regretted it. For Bella looked up from her tiny striptease and to the window. She saw me; I'm sure, for she hurried over to me, opening the window quickly.

"Edward," she breathed lustfully, "I didn't know…"

"I'm sure you knew I was there," I said, easily making my way into the room. Softly landing onto the floor, I looked down at her brown eyes staring at me with anticipation. "You were always such a tease, Bella Swan."

She laughed a light, nymph laugh. Could she be any more seductive or stupid? I could not decide. But I pushed a piece of her hair from her eyes.

"So," I said, "are you dressing for the wrong occasion? Or, is that all you'll be wearing tonight, girl of my heart?"

"…You tell me," she said shyly, moving past me and onto the bed. She scooted up to the headboard of her bed, resting back on the pillows.

"Bella," I said, chuckling, "you lack at the skills when it comes to seducing someone."

Bella's face frowned. "I'm sorry," she said, turning her head, "I was trying…"

"Trying, that would be the key word," I said, putting a knee on the bed, and then another. I crawled over to her. "But, you forget who you are with. Edward Cullen, master of sex and S&M."

The look in her eyes now was curiosity and fear. But I reached out and touched her face, slapping it almost with my long hand. She moaned, falling back against the headboard lazily. I smiled, and made my way down to her breasts, my fingers tucking in the hollow.

"Edward," she moaned, "I'm so cold right now," twisting against the pillows. Her hand went forward to touch my penis, and I grabbed it instantly. If she only knew what lied behind my pants, then she would be instantly chagrined.

"Bella," I said, pushing her hand up to her head. I let my mouth wander to her throat, tasting her heartbeat which seemed to still instantly. I always have that effect on her, making her heart stop beating and re-beat. One would think she would be dead by that, but I was Edward Cullen – amazing when it comes to kisses, no? "Tell me, what do you want?"

"Edward," she moaned, "I want the one thing that will make me feel ever so human."

"And what would that be, sweetheart?" I asked, my mouth coming to the swell of one (dare I call it?) breast.

"I want you to fuck me ever so hard," she said, "and I don't care if it kills me."

I stopped in my assault, looking up into her lust filled eyes. This was something I feared. Feared so much… but not for the reasons she just said.

Because I was a vampire, organs that used to work (especially the ones used for sex) did not work like they used to. I remember back when I used to sit and look at my father's risqué dime novels and move my hand across my penis. The way it seemed to stand straight up at the end and the copious amount of fluid that issued forth from it! I only waited for the day that I'd sheathe myself into some girl.

But that day would never come, for I was turned into a vampire not long after. And the blissful act, now known as jacking-off, was impossible. Even growing hard after seeing a girl's breast was impossible as well.

If Bella only knew this, her sex experience would be for naught and she would receive no pleasure. For, I'd possibly just kill her by trying to lie on top of her.

"Edward?" She asked, waiting for me to respond. I was aroused from my thoughts and I smiled a bit, reassuring her.

"Bella," I said, "can't I pleasure you without us going that far?"

"Edward," she said, "If that is how you feel about our relationship, then I will be sure to get Jacob to stick me with his penis. I'm sure that's what he's wanted to do from the moment he saw me."

I growled and with my superhuman vampire speed, I ripped off her panties. She yelped, and I got close into her face.

"Then, if you say it that way," I purred, "I'd be happy to fuck you, my dear."

She smiled, and we both watched when I slid one of my long fingers into her warm pussy. I pushed it up so far, that she almost rose a foot off the bed. She gasped from the pleasure she was receiving, and I only wished I could receive that pleasure as well.

"Edward," she said, "I want to touch you, too."

"No," I said, "not yet…"

"When?" She breathed. "I want you, now."

"Not yet," I growled, becoming even more embarrassed that my hidden organ could not even raise up a fraction of an inch from the dormant state it was in. God, just to have it raise an inch! An inch to please my Bella!

"Edward," she moaned, when I removed my finger from her pussy. It was covered with blood and cum. I must have hit her maidenhood in the process. I wiped my finger on her bedspread.

"Bella," I said softly, "do you really want me to fuck you?"

"Yes," she said, "more than anything!"

I grabbed a bit of her blanket, ripping it. I now had in my hand a scrap of fabric, just long enough. I instantly tied it around her eyes, and she giggled.

"Edward," she asked, pressing her hands up to her eyes, "are we playing a game?"

"Yes," I said. _If you think having a substitute penis into you is a game, then yes._

"Good," she said, "I like playing games, especially games that you make."

I paused at that response, eyeing the room for something to resemble my penis. I started wracking my brain, trying to think of something to shove up into her to give her fulfillment. And then, it hit me!

"Bella," I breathed next to her ear, "hold on for a second. And don't peak," I said, getting off the bed, and with my speed and agility, I hurried to the kitchen below. Opening the fridge, I looked through the contents until I found what I was looking for. I took the vegetable out from the vegetable drawer, and held it in my hand. It was cold, it was solid, and it would do. A cucumber would give Bella what she wanted. But, I squeezed it just a bit to resemble a penis, giving it the wrinkles and the contour shape.

I hurried back up to Bella, and to her I was only gone for a second or two. She was starting to take off her blindfold, but I slapped it back down on her eyes.

"Well, my dear," I said, quite content now, "any last request?"

"Condoms," she whispered, "Charlie has a package of them in the bathroom."

"Really, I would have thought that you knew I could not get you pregnant?"

"I still want to be safe, Edward," she said, her thin lips turning into a small pout. I nodded, and hurried to the bathroom, finding the package of condoms and taking one out. Hurrying back to her room, I closed the door and locked it.

"Well," I said, taking the condom from its wrapper. "It's time, Bella," I said huskily, "and I hope you're ready."

"Oh, Edward," she said, "please, I've waited forever for this!"

I nodded, sliding the condom over the cucumber. I was surprised that the rubber stretched over the vegetable. Getting on the bed, I made my way over to Bella. I guided the cucumber to her wet pussy, allowing it to brush against her.

"Oh!" She cried, bucking her hips up. I took my other hand, steadying her hips. "Edward, please," she asked softly, "please."

I could not take another one of her pleas. So without further adieu, I thrust the cucumber up into her tiny sheath. If she cried out from pain or pleasure, I could not tell. It could have been both! But there she was, throwing her head back and her mouth forming a small 'o'.

I removed the fake penis out of her body, and then forced it back inside. She bucked at the force of that thrust, and I pressed her down against the sheets again.

"Edward," she gasped, "I think I'm going to…"

"Save it Bella," I said harshly, "I'm not done yet." And I repeated the act, having her writhe on the bed below me. I took her legs with both of my hands, and widened them. She moaned a bit harder, and I made sure to shove the cucumber in more.

She was writhing around on the bed, grasping for my head blindly. I kept ducking and dodging, easily missing her hands.

"Edward," she moaned with satisfaction. And then suddenly, like dressing on a salad, she came on that cucumber. When I saw her release her juices, I only wished that it was _my_ penis was being the salad to her dressing! "God Edward, this is so amazing!" She moaned again, raking her hands through her hair like a wanton goddess. "I never thought I'd feel this way before again!"

I almost wanted to know if she had pleasured her with a cucumber before, but I decided not to ask. I nodded, and removed the cucumber again. "Well, you're lucky you're having sex with Edward Cullen."

And then suddenly, when I pushed it back up into her (I had forgotten how many times I have done it now) something happened. The cucumber broke, and a large snap echoed through her bare room. We both heard it, I was sure of this, for she then stopped writhing and her lips turned into an ugly frown.

"Edward," she whispered, "what was that?"

I could not answer her simple retarded question, for I was dumbfounded myself! What can I say to her? _Well, Bella, you're not going to believe this, but my penis broke inside of you!_

"Well, Bella, you're not going to believe this, but my penis broke inside of you."

She started crying and shaking as if she was having a seizure on the bed. "Edward, get it out! Please get it out!"

"Bella," I said simply, "I'm no doctor; I fear that it might be up too far for me to get it out…"

"Edward, please! Charlie is going to be coming home soon! I can't have your penis stuck inside of me!"

How dumb could she be? But she was buying it, every single word. Bella was crying now, and here I sat with a half of a cucumber in my hand. I almost wanted to take a bite out of it. I was slightly stressed.

"Edward," she whimpered.

"Bella," I said, "you're just going to have to force it out. Pretend like you're giving birth. Force it out with your vaginal muscles."

I stashed the fake penis down my trousers with lightning speed as she took off her blindfold. Her eyes were red, and tears were sticky on her eyelids and cheeks. She grabbed her sheet, and hurried out of the room into the bathroom in the hall. When she closed the door, I opened the window and hurled the cucumber out of the room and into the night sky.

"Edward!" She called, her voice sounded distressed. "I feel it! But, I can't get it out."

"Keep forcing it out Bella," I called, shutting the window. "You wanted to have sex, so now we're going to stimulate giving birth – you get everything tonight." And then I saw lights coming down the street. It was Charlie, his truck pulled up into the driveway.

I had to go, and I had to go now.

"Edward," she said, "I think it's coming out!"

"Bella," I called, "I have to go. Your father is home."

"Edward," she called, "I can see it…"

I opened the window and stole out onto the branch, easing my way through the rickety tree. I watched Charlie walk to the house, unlocking the door. He turned on the inner light, and I jumped from the branch onto the ground. The door closed as soon as I straightened up, and I ran.

_Bella, my love, one day… I'll be able to give you what you want without my penis being the downfall of our love. _


End file.
